Sunday, June 14, 2015

My New Normal

So, as I said, life went on, but in a whole different way.  My Dad kept his word and I saw him on weekends.  He worked a lot, he had two jobs, so he only had Saturday night and Sunday off.  I looked so forward to that time together.  It was just me and him, hanging out.  Since he didn't have much time off he always had to clean his apartment on the weekend too.  He was a very clean and organized man, so when I came over on Saturday night the first thing we did was clean together.  Now you would think....uggghhh cleaning, but I loved it just because it was time spent with my Dad.  I dusted and did whatever I could to help.  We always had some dinner he got somewhere, and then we called it a night.  Sunday was always the day I looked so forward to because he always had something planned.  He did a good job when it came to making sure we had fun together.  We went to the Arch, Clarksville to ride the skylift, and all kinds of places that were fun.  I remember really enjoying myself.  I always came home on Sunday night happy as could be.  Being with my Dad was also an escape from the stressful atmosphere in my weekday home with my Mom.  At the time I didn't realize how much stress there really was, but looking back - it was a lot.

The weekends were so short, it seemed I was just starting to relax and it was time to go back home.  My new "replacement Dad, Butch" was doing his best, but my Mom was a mess.  It seemed she was stressed about everything, but mostly she was stressed about money. At the time I didn't understand the issues, all I knew was she didn't think my Dad paid enough child support, and I felt like she was angry at me about it.  She would tell me in quite the tone that "your Dad doesn't pay near what he should, it doesn't come close to covering your third of the house payment, and water bill, etc (she would rattle off every bill related to the house), he got off easy, I should take him back to court".   Now I was five years old, and when I heard that it used to scare me because I didn't understand what court was, but I thought it might mean court could put hin in jail, so I worried a lot about this issue.

She never liked it that I came home happy either.  That made her mad.  She told me my time with him wasn't reality.  I didn't know what that meant either, but I did know I really looked forward to those weekends to relax.

Life was so different for me now.  My Dad was a morning person and so was I, but my Mom was not.  So when my Dad left and Butch moved in they slept in whenever they could, which was often.  I was forbid to make any noise to wake them.  This was so challenging for me.  I would wake up early and want to do something, or maybe even just use the bathroom, but I was scared to death to make a noise.  The upstairs had two bedrooms, one for them, and one for me, and it had a bathroom at the end of the hallway, so it was close quarters, any noise at all would disturb her and that really ticked her off.  I hated the mornings, and loved when I was at my Dad's and we both go up early.

Money continued to be the talk of the house.  I knew Butch worked, he sold cars and I knew he hated it.  I remember one day they were talking about it and she said, "how's it feel that this is your last day".  He was apparently quitting.  He was really happy about it.  I didn't really get why he was quitting if we were supposedly so broke.

I knew Butch's Dad and Stepmom (Rosie) well since they lived across the street still.  His Dad was called "Eddie", or now "Grandpa Eddie".  One thing I knew about Grandpa Eddie was, he always had a lot of money, rolls of it, $100 bills would be rolled up in his pocket and he pealed them off like dollar bills.  I knew he spent a lot of time in Miami too an he never worked for anyone, it seemed he always had some deal going with a business.  I didn't understand it all back then, but I grew up to get it.  We spent many years intertwined with his business ventures, and, well, that's a story for another day...

I have to get up and get going so I'll pick up next week!


  1. I'm enjoying this story as much as your Alaska adventure.

  2. Your stories are the best. I love them. Keep them coming!!

  3. Your childhood sounds a lot like mine Jane, and it's wasn't a lifestyle for children! Only I didn't have a dad that wanted me any more than my mom did. They just used me to get even with one another. I'm happy you had a good dad to at least get to be with on the weekends. Can't wait to hear more about this "grandpa Eddie" guy and I'm not thinking that this is not going to go well. Hugs, Brenda

  4. Just when I was settling in for a long story..boom...ended!!! LoL till next time!!

  5. So sorry that you were exposed to grown up things when you were just a baby. I can understand how that would cause you so much stress. Grandpa Eddie seems like a shady character, I hope I'm wrong...really enjoying your story and looking forward to the next installment.

  6. You are such a good writer Jane! I enjoyed your Alaska adventure and I'm enjoying getting to know you more from your current installments!